Humans are selfish

I know the title comes off as a blanket statement but humans are naturally selfish. What I mean is that the way the world is designed, if our needs as human are not getting met, by nature we look for a way to feel this void. Many of the outlets can include sex, drugs, socialism, companionship, committing crimes, murder and many of decisions that may not be in our best interest.

Don’t get me wrong I think it’s important to always consider your well being and to respect others. If you don’t look out for yourself while walking this earth who will? But I really want to touch on the topic of selfishness that tends to hurt others. Often times as humans we get caught up in what we lack that it’s easy to disregard what we do have. The term grass is greener on the other side is a great way for example. If a human is not getting its needs met in a situation that’s toxic to your well being such as emotionally, mentally, physically as far as health is concerned, these need to be considered and yes you must do what’s best for you and that other person to get out of a toxic unfulfilling situation. On the flip side there is a such thing as selfishness for the wrong unnatural man made reasons such as cheating, lusting, stealing, hurting others, manipulation to get what you want, harm to others to get ahead, mentally and emotionally terrorizing another person because of your own hurt and pain….the lost can go on. This is what I mean by people are naturally selfish and when this is not understood, it’s easy for someone to hurt others to get needs met. It’s a learned behavior and many times a way to feel a temporary void that unfortunately we may not always be able to come back from.

What do you think about humans and selfishness? Thanks for reading!

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The Importance of Mental Health

This has been a topic in the media lately.  Let me know if you agree. There has been quite a few celebrity’s in the past few years committing suicide.  When you think of a celebrity lifestyle with fame, fortune and money, an average person such as myself would feel like whats there to be sad and depressed about?  I guess the saying is true, More Money More Problems. You never really know until your in the situation what comes along with it.

Mental Health – a person’s condition with regard to their psychological and emotional well-being.

In my opinion, mental health begins as a child.  Your experiences, and environment shapes you as you grow into your own.  When we become adults we either run from our past or repeat it because this is all we know.   Many children are exposed to things that have hurt their mental health and never received any treatment for it, so this behavior they are accustom to becomes normalized. What tends to happen is we gravitate to those who have had similar experiences because they are relate-able, and repeat a cycle which could be abusive relationships, drugs, promiscuity, crime etc. Kids look up to those closest to them which could be a parent, sibling, family member, friend.  Sometimes and in many cases these folks aren’t the best example, so what tends to happen is this child, now an adult grows up to believe that those experiences are normal, and this shows love.  In other cases there are children who vear the other way and do everything in their power not to repeat a generational cycle and go another route.  Many of these children have some form of mentor, or person in their life they pay attention to that may have overcome adversity, or find something to break the cycle for them such as getting a good education, using a talent, moving away and living with family members more stable etc.  

Mental Health affects you as an adult in many ways because what you feel and think can determine your decision making in life.  These thoughts and feelings are the driver of positive and negative energy. Your mental health can cause you to act out, or make rash decisions you cannot change later.  Many of these decisions not only hurt you, but others you care about. If mental health is not taken seriously, there is a large increase in crimes, murders, and abuse. Erratic behavior and episodes are prime examples that their could be something mentally not stable with a person. The answer is not always medication because the downside of medicating a mental illness is you become dependent on it to live life. The drugs make you feel as if you have thing sunder control, but your a dose away from hurting yourself and others. Many murders in jail have experiences as a child that has shaped them into believe their crime was justified or they were exposed to this behavior. 

I honestly believe once someone mentally has checked out, its hard to get back to that place of sanity. Reason is your constantly finding ways to cope,  This can be drugs, medication, and other actions that can hurt yourself and others. Mental health plays a huge role on your physical health as well. The drugs you put into your body can have affects on your health and organs. Think of all the celebrities who were affected by mental illness for whatever reason, most died of drug overdose. Michael Jackson, Whitney Houston, Prince, Teena Marie, Mac Miller and the list goes on.  Lets pray for Kanye West because he is clearly not mentally all there at this time. Suicide is real too, Kate Spade, Robin Williams just to name a few. Whats your thought on this topic?!

Thank you for reading! 

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Why I Decided to Give Up Social Media

It was time. I had a Facebook Page since 2010, and before that a MySPACE page since 2005.  When does it get enough of sharing your most intimate moments for people you don’t speak to or haven’t seen in years? When it was just me, as a single woman, no children and really no major responsibilities, it was fun, exciting and a great way to meet new people. But as I entered my 30’s, got married, and planned for my first child, I realized I only want to share these intimate moments with my family and friends that I actually truly know cares about me. I feel like if I am friends with someone on Facebook, but we don’t have each-others phone number or mutual friends, are we truly FRIENDS? The people I consider my friends I can text, pick up the phone and call them, send an email.  We communicate more frequently than not often and I am able to invite them to these intimate moments because they are truly my friends. 

Many people on Social media want to be nosy, or compare their lives to others. Half of most peoples friends are people they went to High=school with but haven’t seen in years and probably didn’t even LIKE in HS. One thing about the internet, once its on there, it gives access to any and everyone to know your business. I use to think, it was alright to post your children but you don’t know what lunatic is lurking or can get access to your kids, location, home etc. I am not trying to be Hippocratic because I once was on social media but find it refreshing to know I have some bit of privacy. I use to faithfully scroll through Instagram and FB when I had the apps, almost like second nature. Now its almost been a year since I disconnected, and don’t miss it at all. If I want to learn the latest gossip, I will try YOUTUBE. Honestly I would rather just BLOG. 

Thanks for Reading!

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September Favorites!

Hey loves! I wanted to share some of my recent favorites with you all.  I know its been a while so I am long overdue for a post.  If you tried any of these products or have similar faves please comment below so I can try them out as well. 

  1. Nike VaporMaxx Running Shoes – I love these sneakers!  If you are looking for slim fit, comfort as if you walking on air, a sneaker you can wear without socks that wont have your feet sweating, this is the shoe!  The sneak has small air pickets that allow your feet to breath while wearing.  The tongue is thin and fits to your ankle for a slim comfortable fit made for walking and or running.  This shoe comes in men’s and women’s sizes, and various colors to fit your personality.  The best part I like it is the air sole which makes each step comfortable.  They are on the pricey side and will run you about 200.00.

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2. Bahama Breeze Restaurant – This is a Caribbean style restaurant who has the best selection of pasts and seafood dishes.  Some of their most popular dishes include jerk chicken entrees, lobsters, steak, and for those not into seafood you can get soups, salads and burgers.  My favorite dish is the shrimp and lobster pasta, its a fettuccine dish with shrimp and pasta.  Soooo goood! You can also choose from a bunch of specialty cocktails and drinks.  My favorite is the Bahamarita which is a frozen drink which you can get virgin or with Tequila.  Check your local area to see if there is a Bahama Breeze near you. I am in the Chicago area, so the closest one to me is in Schaumburg IL. about 30 min outside the city.

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3. Garnier Sensitive Face Wash – This has been great for my skin, and does not leave residue.  It gets into my pores and leaves me with a nice glow before adding moisturizer.  I usually wash my face with this product twice a day and it really has helped me to eliminate breakouts.  It will run you about 8.99 in retail stores.

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4.  Apple Air Pods – These are the absolute best!  They are blue tooth ear buds and you can go hands free without a cord or anything connected.  They come with this cute charging case that keeps them ready for use.  They sink with any blue-tooth device.  They will run you about 200.00 but are so well worth it! You wont regret them.

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5. Rosati’s Pizza – This may just be a Chicago Pizza spot so I apologize if you cannot fine one near you but they have the best pizza…why? Their pizza sauce and cheese is delicious and the pizza is always hot upon delivery.   This pizza even taste great re-warmed. To me, its the seasoning and the taste of the cheese, if you are in or near Chicago, try it, if there is a location near you.

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Thank you for Reading!

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What the Hell is wrong with this picture?

I really hate that we even need to have this as a topic of discussion but it goes to show how you can take a girl out the hood but you won’t take the hood out the girl. I’m sure y’all have read the blogs and saw the TMZ videos of this feud between Cardi B and Nicki Minaj. I’m going to keep my synopsis short and sweet. There’s a time and place for everything and in my opinion when you reach a certain level in your career especially as a world entertainer, you learn to pick your battles. I understand Cardi B hold close to her motto, “I’m gonna be me whether someone likes it or not and I didn’t sign up to be a role model” basically I’m summarizing how she refers to herself in my opinion with that quote. What about the people around her, didn’t anyone in their right mind hollar at her and y’all her out of acting a plum fool??? Why not wait till you catch her in the street if you want to be ratchet but why at a high profile event? Is it that serious? Plus Cardi has shown to be a hipocrit, she cries when someone’s picking on her but Cardi is just as much a bully as Nicki. Yes I think Nicki throws shots and definitely gets under her skin but why not challenge each other with a rap battle, keep it on wax, what’s grown ass women fighting going to do? That’s my take on it, just didn’t make sense to act out. Now you messing with your own bag cause Nicki technically could use this against Cardi legally if she wanted to really be a bitch. Now that isn’t worth it.

Nicki had has her podcast Queen radio where she goes clean in on Cardi and honestly I don’t blame her. She should get clowned for looking a damn fool with her ass out. 😫😦😒

What you think?

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Recommended Author of The Month

I want to share an amazing author with you!  She writes books for the soul and that provides a sense of awareness for each person as an individual.  Her books are motivational and encouraging, which everyone needs time to time. I have personally read “Thirty” which is a definite recommended read.  I also am currently reading “In Case Nobody Told You.”  Check her out here: 

https://www.amazon.com/Emily-Maroutian/e/B002QM4ARE/ref=dbs_t_r_fta_b002qm4are

Her name is Emily Maroutian. Her material can be found on Amazon.com. 

“A Second Opinion” – Theories and Observations on Life and Human Behavior414Bi-jLgWL._UY250_

“The Process of I” – An exploration into the Intertwined Relationship between Identity and Environment

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“The Energy of Emotions” -The 10 Emotional Environments and How They Shape The World Around Us

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Page from this book:

“Thirty” – A Collection of Personal Quotes, Advice and Lessons

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“The Empowered Self” – Over 100 Activities and Steps for Creating An Empowered Mind

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“The Book Of Relief” – Passages and Exercises to Relieve Negative Emotion and Create More Ease in The Body

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“Adventures in Thinking” – Opening the Mind Beyond Practiced Limitations

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“In Case Nobody Told You” – Passages of Wisdom and Encouragement

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Here is a sample page from the book:

Thank you for Reading!

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These Damn Cell Phones?!

Today on the train I had time to observe something I am sure we all have noticed in the past decade, PEOPLE ARE GLUED TO THEIR CELL PHONES. I was sitting no the train reading emails in MY PHONE, and as I glance over out the window to a passing train going the same way, I was able to peep in and see almost everyone on the train had their head down face first in their phone.  People either were scrolling through social media, listening to music, on the internet, and I am sure various other tasks.  Whats interesting is how we have become so accustom to always having our cell phones with us.  Its like we never once was able to exist with out them.  If you think back 30 years ago, there was no such thing as a cellular phone.  I believe they had just created the car phones which was the newest invention.  It amazes me how even I cant leave home without my cell phone.  Its literally my life line to my family, friends, bank account, email, photos etc.  

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HOW DID WE DEVELOP CELL PHONE DEPENDENCY?

From what I understand I think it comes down to convenience.  As humans, we will invest in whatever makes our lives easier.  We are easily smitten by the media and its newest inventions to make money.  Every 6 months they come out with a new device that seems to make our lives easier with even faster wi-fi connections.  Along with the newest cell phones, they even have watches that can notify you of missed texts and phone calls.  Is this even necessary?  Don’t get me wrong, I would be an anxious wreck if I didn’t have my cell phone, or to text my husband throughout the day, or have access to my bank account etc.  Its just crazy how we as human got to this place of dependency.  Its definitely a way for the government to keep money flowing in along with student loan debt, taxes, and other ways that humans contribute that are unseen.  If you ever want to see what I am saying, sit and pay attention to the folks around you, how many people are holding or on their cell phone.  Besides talking on the phone, or listening to music, pay attention to folks on the elevator, train, bus, patiently waiting etc. and you will see many people avoid awkward eye contact, conversation, because we have become so prone to being social on our cell phones and less social in person. Just something to observe if you haven’t already.  Thanks for Reading!

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Illuminati, Stay Right Where You Are!

The Media sucks, plain and simple.  They pull us in by broadcasting what is trending at the time and force us to swallow it until its no longer a HOT TOPIC.  Many of these things displayed in the media are planned and sponsored by the big guys behind the scene. The money you have, or can generate will dictate how much love and support the media will give you. If you can bring media attention, and make them money, you can have the spot light.  The media LOVES people who make an ass of themselves and don’t care.  They will actually pay these people to do something unethical JUST to bring attention to their media platform whether its be radio, News, TV, Social media sites etc. For example, Kanye West, he made a complete ass of himself last week and the media took to it, and forced his coonery down our throats.  That’s why they give him the attention cause they support him being an attention whore.  I am not trying to put anyone down in this blog post, but it makes me sick how the media will give the attention to those that really are irrelevant to our lives. Another example is Kim Kardashian.  Hey, I am not hating on her, she pulled the worlds attention in by her fiasco’s and attention whore ways and it paid off for herself and family.  So you think, Kim and Kanye both will do whatever they deem fit to keep media attention them even if it is unethical, selfish, makes no sense.  

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We can look at this as entertainment but when is enough, enough.  When do you sit back and realize making dumb decisions to get media attention is only going to hurt you in the long run.  Another example, the Kardashian sisters all have babies out of wedlock accept Kim (whose marriage I think is crumbling but they are going to hide it and be fake for  ratings.) *sidenote* Typically if these were African american woman, it would be looked down upon, judged, and definitely not gloried in the media.  Its just a double standard.  If it was another rapper who made a fool of themselves like Kanye West did, they would be more than likely black balled.  Oh, but since its Kanye, watch he have an album drop in a few weeks so we LOVE him again, and low key forget what of an ass he made of himself last week.  

One last example, Cardi B, hey she is winning right now.  The media gives her so much attention, and the record labels have put so much money behind her because she is playing the media game, she posts snap chats, Instagram posts almost everyday, she shared 90% of her life online and the media loves her ratchetness. So anyone that is willing to be recruited by the media and play their role to generate a profit whether you sell your soul or not, will be front and center with the medias attention, President TRUMP keeps himself in the media for the WRONG reasons….smh….stay woke lol. Thank you for reading!

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PIINK DIIVA has been Nominated for the Liebster Award! 🥇

I want to thank my beautiful follower 5’2withanattitude for nominating me with the Liebster Award.

Thank-you-red

Below are some questions that were asked to those nominated for this Blogger award that I am excited to share with you. Majority of these questions are to get to know me better, and see how much we may have in common.

1. Thinking back to grade school, what TV show was your favorite?

My favorite grade school show that I use to watch every morning was The Bozo Show.  If anyone remembers this show it was that crazy clown who always did pranks, and had kids on his show play the Grand Prize game to win prizes.  He also showed cartoons during his show such as Woody Wood Pecker, and Yogi the Bear. This was definitely a great childhood memory.

2 What was your most memorable moment in 2017?

My most memorable moment in 2017 was my 1 year anniversary.  I got married in 2016 and when I hit my 1 year mark of marriage with my husband it was a great day.

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3 If you were trapped on a deserted island, and you were allowed to bring any three people — dead, alive, famous, or non famous– who would they be and why?

If I was trapped on an island and allowed three people there is no question it would be:

-Mom, sister, and my husband

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4 Describe yourself in 3 words.

Ambitious, Analytical, Relatable

5 What is your most guiltiest pleasure?

My guilty pleasure is sweets, especially cupcakes – Red Velvet – Yummy!

6 What are 3 things you take with you everywhere no matter what?

My purse – I cant leave home without my purse – if you need me to be specific probably my cell phone.

7 What is one book you started reading and never finished but wished you had?

The 48 Laws of Power

 

6 If you could choose an alternate first name for yourself, what would it be?

Honestly I would probably just use my middle name which is Andrea

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What makes me passionate about writing:

What makes me passionate about writing is that many times other share the same opinions and experiences as you, and we don’t always have the means to connect or vent to these people any other way.  Sometimes family and friends do not understand what your going through, so writing is a way to reach beyond your limits and connect with those that may be able to get your through those turbulent times.  Also its a way of self expression, and promotes creativity.  Its just an awesome way to share thoughts and feelings.

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The Social Media Experience

Good morning!!!! Happy Monday.  I felt compelled to write about something that has become so main stream and so normal that people are shocked when you do not utilize it. SOCIAL MEDIA.  I will admit, I use to be on there for years, I remember having a Black planet Page, that was the first, then MYSPACE, next Facebook and Now Instagram.  I saw the social media phenomenon over the years take off!  It was exciting cause you can meet people across the country and as it progressed, showcase your life, and stay in touch with friends/family from a distance.  But I must ask, has social media really bought us closer????

You can analyze this in two ways, does it cause you to verbally speak more, or do you find yourself scrolling and taking in every picture and post with envy if it “LOOKS” like they have the perfect life? Does this cause you to want to call them to support, or be nosy and find out whats going on?  The thing about social media is that it can turn into a competition on who can showcase all of their business the most, and whose lives look the best based on pictures, and status updates and shared internet quotes. Don’t get me wrong, its amazing to see everyone doing GREAT, but what I have learned is that people only post what they want you to know!  A picture is only a moment in time.  That picture can be the false smile of a girl that is considering suicide, that happy couples picture can be a mending of a abusive relationship that everyone thinks is the perfect couple. The status update can be from a man or woman who constantly compares their life to what others are doing but has lost reality of themselves.

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My point is, remember social media is a fake word.  Its a place where you can show the world either your REAL life or How you WISH your life really was.   You ever wonder why some people delete their accounts?  They probably caught a case of FACEBOOK or Instagram Envy and wanted to divorce themselves from that feeling. It may sound crazy but its real I am pretty sure everyone has experience it once whether it was personal, financial or recreational.  Someone posted something that made you feel a way at some point in time.

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I always recommend to take time out to disconnect.  Everyone does not have to know your next move in life.  Some moments are sacred. Special. For you and your family. Don’t let your life get dictated by what the majority is doing, do it because it serves value to yourself and always consider what you post because Trust me once its on the internet it stays forever. Thanks for Reading guys!

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