Humans are selfish

I know the title comes off as a blanket statement but humans are naturally selfish. What I mean is that the way the world is designed, if our needs as human are not getting met, by nature we look for a way to feel this void. Many of the outlets can include sex, drugs, socialism, companionship, committing crimes, murder and many of decisions that may not be in our best interest.

Don’t get me wrong I think it’s important to always consider your well being and to respect others. If you don’t look out for yourself while walking this earth who will? But I really want to touch on the topic of selfishness that tends to hurt others. Often times as humans we get caught up in what we lack that it’s easy to disregard what we do have. The term grass is greener on the other side is a great way for example. If a human is not getting its needs met in a situation that’s toxic to your well being such as emotionally, mentally, physically as far as health is concerned, these need to be considered and yes you must do what’s best for you and that other person to get out of a toxic unfulfilling situation. On the flip side there is a such thing as selfishness for the wrong unnatural man made reasons such as cheating, lusting, stealing, hurting others, manipulation to get what you want, harm to others to get ahead, mentally and emotionally terrorizing another person because of your own hurt and pain….the lost can go on. This is what I mean by people are naturally selfish and when this is not understood, it’s easy for someone to hurt others to get needs met. It’s a learned behavior and many times a way to feel a temporary void that unfortunately we may not always be able to come back from.

What do you think about humans and selfishness? Thanks for reading!

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The Rise of Single Motherhood

I’m sure this is a topic that many of us have known to become true in the last couple of decades for women of all races but I’m going to focus on African American women because studies show that we have the highest rise in single motherhood than the other groups.

There are many reasons we can point the blame to but the truth be told that it’s so common these days that we have become to accept it as normal. Let’s fist discuss some of the potential reasons that started this epidemic:

-Many African American fathers are dead or in jail. Half our men have been killed with by the police or crime involvement weather voluntarily or innocent bystander. Black men get locked up and much harsher sentencing than any other race so it’s not surprising many of them are in jail and unable to raise their children. Many of the reasoning for black men to go to jail are environment upbringings that put them in a situation to survive such as selling drugs for money, crime to feed family or finding no way out of unfortunate circumstances. These are reasons that we have known for many years challenge African American men.

This has trickled down to the households where girlfriends and wives of black men are left as widows or single mothers because these men are no longer in the home to help raise the family. So this falls on the shoulders of the women. It’s like a domino effect.

Now let’s shoot years later in the new millennium and examine how this mentality has become normal. For many years we have seen grandmothers, mothers, sisters, cousins, friends and aunts raise their children alone for whatever reason that the father is not involved or in the home that we have come accustom to accepting that this is what is alright. I say this now because almost everyone knows at least two or more black single mothers that never been married to the father, or decided to become a single mother by choice without hesitation. It’s like we come together as a sisterhood and support this thinking because we are so use to doing it alone due to growing up and seeing many of our fore-mothers raising children alone due to the circumstances above. When something is common it’s likely to become normalized and that’s why I feel it’s a rise in the black community.

We can’t forget the small group of women that feel they would be good moms and raise a child themselves without the father and this may potentially be true to the fact that women are becoming head of household, have higher educations in the black community to the male counterparts, less crime rate and affiliation, and hold jobs that allow the income to raise a child on their own. So with this belief many women feel empowered that they can be a great single mother by choice.

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There are upsides and downsides which affect not having a family structure. Many we already know and understand and sometimes it’s best not to be in a situation that is unhealthy for parents and child. In this situation a healthy co parenting situation will be better if not JUST as rewarding for everyone involved. If this is priority in most single family households, we could see less affects in the black community. What do you think? Thanks for reading!

Are You Serious -Skin Bleaching?

Today I came across an article that really had me blown away.  Honestly before I get started….I asked myself, why am I shocked, when your dealing with a manipulator, they will do anything to secure the bag or get ahead.  I am talking about Blac Chyna….she is promoting a new skin bleaching cream called “Whitealicious.”  She is promoting it in Lagos, Africa….a place where there is an epidemic of colorsim and skin bleaching. You going to a country of majority dark skin people and promoting a skin bleaching cream as to say that dark skin is ugly, and I can make you pretty by using this skin cream. As an African american woman, you would think she would have enough decency to say “NO.” I refuse to sell this crap to my people. Its unhealthy and not safe. But the superficial chick she is…….

First skin bleaching is unsafe, and unhealthy.  It can cause all type of skin diseases and problems long term.  When your uneducated and superficial, you will over look these issues and continue to expose yourself to become unhealthy.  The fact that an African american woman, who I am pretty sure knows that this is a problem and not safe will promote a product in AFRICA of all countries is sick. Here is a picture of the advertisement below: 

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Skin bleaching from my research is a huge issue in places like Africa, Asia, China and islands of Jamaica. Places where there are people of color. They feel like “white” skin is more pretty and attractive and you get more attention.  Now don’t get this confused with “light skin.”  I am talking “white” skin. Example below:

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Yall this is a hot mess! When you been brainwashed to believe that skin with melanin is not beautiful you will go to lengths to change it.  Whats crazy is that these things are unsafe.  The cause long term health issues such as :

  • skin turning dark or too light.
  • thinning of the skin.
  • visible blood vessels in the skin.
  • scarring.
  • kidney, liver or nerve damage.
  • abnormalities in a newborn baby (if used during pregnancy

I wanted to post this issue to see what your thoughts.  Thanks for reading!

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Celebrating Women!

I wanted to make a post centered around celebrating women! Being a woman comes with many reward and challenges.  We have come a long way for equal rights and I must say, LADIES…we are dominating but still have along way to go.  First lets celebrate what we have achieved in the past decades!  

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#1. Independence – We have been able to secure some of the top careers in places that we were never able to navigate such as politics, running for president, mayor, governor, CEO of some of the largest fortune five hundred companies. We now are mothers and head of household in many homes. We are able to raise children and have a prosperous career at the same time. Although we have a ways to go when it comes to equal pay among-st our male counter parts, lets celebrate this achievement thus far!

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#2. Education – We have been able to secure education status of Masters, Doctoral, JD status just to name a few.  In the past, we had to sit back and watch our male counter parts dominate the education system and get the better jobs, but now, ladies we are able to go as high as we want in the education system and change some of the though process from the past that we were to be barefoot and pregnant after high-school.  NOT ANYMORE!

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#3. Women of Color – I want to celebrate ladies of color because the struggle IS real. Although for ALL women have faced and issues, women of color have faced many additional challenges from racism, judgement, media and scrutiny just to name a few for decades and still have a long road to go. The day that all women can come together and make their power and presence known, we can overcome some of the challenges still faced as a GENDER. Forget a RACE, lets band together as a GENDER and knock the socks of these dick heads!  Unity is stronger than individual segregation. Lets celebrate women AND women of color pressing forward and staying strong when everyone else has been against us ALL. What you say?

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If there is anything else you believe should be celebrated by all women please comment and share, thank you for Reading!

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My Favorite Beauty Bloggers!

Happy Wednesday, or shall we say Hump Day! Today I wanted to do something different and write about some of my favorite beauty bloggers.  Its been three years since I started following some of my favorite beauty enthusiasts.  What I look for in a beauty bloggers channel is honesty, real reviews, unique style, flawless natural beauty as well as a BEAT face.  I will list some of my favorites so that you can enjoy as well!

The GlamTwinz334 – These girls were my first YouTube subscription. I am not sure how they came across my feed but after watching a few videos I was an instant fan.  What makes them unique is that they are twins and have such an interesting collaboration that that set out to grow their hair natural, and with length at that.  They have tailbone natural hair and they started their hair journey years ago.  They showcase tips and products they like to use with honest feedback.  They have a cute style that gave me a lot of ideas when trying to change up my hair.  They match their make up to what they are wearing and its fun to watch and get ideas on styles.  They are very particular about their style like me which I can appreciate.  Besides “Get Ready With Me make up tutorials, Fashion Hauls from stores like Zara, Pretty Little Thing, Asos, Fashion Nova and other online boutiques, I really enjoy their Favorite Product Reviews, they also have a VLOG channel where they show their travels, events, and just day to day life activities. Must See!

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Amynicolaox – She is also one of my first subscriptions. I like her channel because she does a lot of fashion reviews.  Most her clothes are high end but every now and then she will reviews on affordable lines.  She is very detailed and honest which I like.  Also, she is from Canada which is cool, and she has a  unique accent.  This makes her stand out and has variety.  She also is really into fitness so she aims to show alot of her work out routines, and healthy meal preps. If your into fashion and fitness she is pretty entertaining to view. Must See!

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Brannygiz – I love her channel because she is your everyday relate-able woman.  She is in her late thirties and reviews on affordable finds from store like Home Goods, Ross, Marshall’s, Sephora, Ulta and almost all the usual stores I enjoy shopping.  Whats cool is she is also from Chicago which so am I!  She does a lot of make up reviews, hair reviews, clothing hauls, home shopping hauls and VLOGS of her everyday life.  She is definitely a favorite because her looks are affordable and she aims her VLOGS to the average around the day woman of all ages.  She caters to a mature audience which can be hard to find in the beauty world, when majority are teens- twenty year old.  Must See!                                                                                                                                                unnamed (1)

If you have a chance, head on over to YOUTUBE with your favorite wine or coffee and check out a few of their videos! Thank you for Reading!

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