Why I Decided to Give Up Social Media

It was time. I had a Facebook Page since 2010, and before that a MySPACE page since 2005.  When does it get enough of sharing your most intimate moments for people you don’t speak to or haven’t seen in years? When it was just me, as a single woman, no children and really no major responsibilities, it was fun, exciting and a great way to meet new people. But as I entered my 30’s, got married, and planned for my first child, I realized I only want to share these intimate moments with my family and friends that I actually truly know cares about me. I feel like if I am friends with someone on Facebook, but we don’t have each-others phone number or mutual friends, are we truly FRIENDS? The people I consider my friends I can text, pick up the phone and call them, send an email.  We communicate more frequently than not often and I am able to invite them to these intimate moments because they are truly my friends. 

Many people on Social media want to be nosy, or compare their lives to others. Half of most peoples friends are people they went to High=school with but haven’t seen in years and probably didn’t even LIKE in HS. One thing about the internet, once its on there, it gives access to any and everyone to know your business. I use to think, it was alright to post your children but you don’t know what lunatic is lurking or can get access to your kids, location, home etc. I am not trying to be Hippocratic because I once was on social media but find it refreshing to know I have some bit of privacy. I use to faithfully scroll through Instagram and FB when I had the apps, almost like second nature. Now its almost been a year since I disconnected, and don’t miss it at all. If I want to learn the latest gossip, I will try YOUTUBE. Honestly I would rather just BLOG. 

Thanks for Reading!

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September Favorites!

Hey loves! I wanted to share some of my recent favorites with you all.  I know its been a while so I am long overdue for a post.  If you tried any of these products or have similar faves please comment below so I can try them out as well. 

  1. Nike VaporMaxx Running Shoes – I love these sneakers!  If you are looking for slim fit, comfort as if you walking on air, a sneaker you can wear without socks that wont have your feet sweating, this is the shoe!  The sneak has small air pickets that allow your feet to breath while wearing.  The tongue is thin and fits to your ankle for a slim comfortable fit made for walking and or running.  This shoe comes in men’s and women’s sizes, and various colors to fit your personality.  The best part I like it is the air sole which makes each step comfortable.  They are on the pricey side and will run you about 200.00.

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2. Bahama Breeze Restaurant – This is a Caribbean style restaurant who has the best selection of pasts and seafood dishes.  Some of their most popular dishes include jerk chicken entrees, lobsters, steak, and for those not into seafood you can get soups, salads and burgers.  My favorite dish is the shrimp and lobster pasta, its a fettuccine dish with shrimp and pasta.  Soooo goood! You can also choose from a bunch of specialty cocktails and drinks.  My favorite is the Bahamarita which is a frozen drink which you can get virgin or with Tequila.  Check your local area to see if there is a Bahama Breeze near you. I am in the Chicago area, so the closest one to me is in Schaumburg IL. about 30 min outside the city.

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3. Garnier Sensitive Face Wash – This has been great for my skin, and does not leave residue.  It gets into my pores and leaves me with a nice glow before adding moisturizer.  I usually wash my face with this product twice a day and it really has helped me to eliminate breakouts.  It will run you about 8.99 in retail stores.

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4.  Apple Air Pods – These are the absolute best!  They are blue tooth ear buds and you can go hands free without a cord or anything connected.  They come with this cute charging case that keeps them ready for use.  They sink with any blue-tooth device.  They will run you about 200.00 but are so well worth it! You wont regret them.

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5. Rosati’s Pizza – This may just be a Chicago Pizza spot so I apologize if you cannot fine one near you but they have the best pizza…why? Their pizza sauce and cheese is delicious and the pizza is always hot upon delivery.   This pizza even taste great re-warmed. To me, its the seasoning and the taste of the cheese, if you are in or near Chicago, try it, if there is a location near you.

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Thank you for Reading!

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What the Hell is wrong with this picture?

I really hate that we even need to have this as a topic of discussion but it goes to show how you can take a girl out the hood but you won’t take the hood out the girl. I’m sure y’all have read the blogs and saw the TMZ videos of this feud between Cardi B and Nicki Minaj. I’m going to keep my synopsis short and sweet. There’s a time and place for everything and in my opinion when you reach a certain level in your career especially as a world entertainer, you learn to pick your battles. I understand Cardi B hold close to her motto, “I’m gonna be me whether someone likes it or not and I didn’t sign up to be a role model” basically I’m summarizing how she refers to herself in my opinion with that quote. What about the people around her, didn’t anyone in their right mind hollar at her and y’all her out of acting a plum fool??? Why not wait till you catch her in the street if you want to be ratchet but why at a high profile event? Is it that serious? Plus Cardi has shown to be a hipocrit, she cries when someone’s picking on her but Cardi is just as much a bully as Nicki. Yes I think Nicki throws shots and definitely gets under her skin but why not challenge each other with a rap battle, keep it on wax, what’s grown ass women fighting going to do? That’s my take on it, just didn’t make sense to act out. Now you messing with your own bag cause Nicki technically could use this against Cardi legally if she wanted to really be a bitch. Now that isn’t worth it.

Nicki had has her podcast Queen radio where she goes clean in on Cardi and honestly I don’t blame her. She should get clowned for looking a damn fool with her ass out. 😫😦😒

What you think?

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What Happened to Lyrics that Matter?

Good morning!  I was inspired to write a post on this song by Kanye West, it was one of his biggest hits at the start of his career, and to me, one of the most lyrical profound songs.  I am talking about “All Falls Down” featuring Syleena Johnson.  It was released in 2004 on the album The College Dropout.  He really changed a lot from when he first came out as a rap artist.  His music had great messages.  I am not taking away what his music sounds like now, but I do feel some of his best work was before he became “Hollywood.”  Please see what I mean below.  I will put the lyrics below and give my synopsis on them. 

Man I promise, she’s so self conscious
She has no idea what she’s doing in college
That major that she majored in don’t make no money
But she won’t drop out, her parents will look at her funny
Now, tell me that ain’t insecure
The concept of school seems so secure
Sophomore three years aint picked a career
She like fuck it, I’ll just stay down here and do hair
Cause that’s enough money to buy her a few pairs of new Airs
Cause her baby daddy don’t really care
She’s so precious with the peer pressure
Couldn’t afford a car so she named her daughter Alexus
She had hair so long that it looked like weave
Then she cut it all off now she look like Eve
And she be dealing with some issues that you can’t believe
Single black female addicted to retail and well

This first verse speaks to over 75% of college students that grow up in environment with obstacles.  Its almost like a story and you can see this girls face, and the struggle of doing what is best for her, and her child…..along with meeting others expectations. 

Man I promise, I’m so self conscious
That’s why you always see me with at least one of my watches
Rollies and Pasha’s done drove me crazy
I can’t even pronounce nothing, pass that versace!
Then I spent 400 bucks on this
Just to be like nigga you ain’t up on this!
And I can’t even go to the grocery store
Without some ones thats clean and a shirt with a team
It seems we living the american dream
But the people highest up got the lowest self esteem
The prettiest people do the ugliest things
For the road to riches and diamond rings
We shine because they hate us, floss cause they degrade us
We trying to buy back our 40 acres
And for that paper, look how low we a’stoop
Even if you in a Benz, you still a nigga in a coop/coupe

This is my favorite verse because its soooo real.  The last line speaks volume, “Even though you in a Benz, you still a nigga in a coupe, meaning don’t material how many material fancy thing you accomplish, you still a nigga. Period. Deep.

I say fuck the police, that’s how I treat em
We buy our way out of jail, but we can’t buy freedom
We’ll buy a lot of clothes when we don’t really need em
Things we buy to cover up what’s inside
Cause they make us hate ourself and love they wealth
That’s why shortys hollering “where the ballas’ at?”
Drug dealer buy Jordans, crackhead buy crack
And a white man get paid off of all of that
But I ain’t even goin’ act holier than thou
Cause fuck it, I went to Jacob with 25 thou
Before I had a house and I’d do it again
Cause I wanna be on 106 and Park pushing a Benz
I wanna act ballerific like it’s all terrific
I got a couple past due bills, I won’t get specific
I got a problem with spending before I get it
We all self conscious I’m just the first to admit it

These are the type of messages that may me enjoy listening to Kanye, I cant say I am going to be anxious to hear his new album, but I may listen to see what his message is now.  Thanks for Reading!!!!

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Recommended Author of The Month

I want to share an amazing author with you!  She writes books for the soul and that provides a sense of awareness for each person as an individual.  Her books are motivational and encouraging, which everyone needs time to time. I have personally read “Thirty” which is a definite recommended read.  I also am currently reading “In Case Nobody Told You.”  Check her out here: 

https://www.amazon.com/Emily-Maroutian/e/B002QM4ARE/ref=dbs_t_r_fta_b002qm4are

Her name is Emily Maroutian. Her material can be found on Amazon.com. 

“A Second Opinion” – Theories and Observations on Life and Human Behavior414Bi-jLgWL._UY250_

“The Process of I” – An exploration into the Intertwined Relationship between Identity and Environment

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“The Energy of Emotions” -The 10 Emotional Environments and How They Shape The World Around Us

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Page from this book:

“Thirty” – A Collection of Personal Quotes, Advice and Lessons

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“The Empowered Self” – Over 100 Activities and Steps for Creating An Empowered Mind

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“The Book Of Relief” – Passages and Exercises to Relieve Negative Emotion and Create More Ease in The Body

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“Adventures in Thinking” – Opening the Mind Beyond Practiced Limitations

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“In Case Nobody Told You” – Passages of Wisdom and Encouragement

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Here is a sample page from the book:

Thank you for Reading!

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These Damn Cell Phones?!

Today on the train I had time to observe something I am sure we all have noticed in the past decade, PEOPLE ARE GLUED TO THEIR CELL PHONES. I was sitting no the train reading emails in MY PHONE, and as I glance over out the window to a passing train going the same way, I was able to peep in and see almost everyone on the train had their head down face first in their phone.  People either were scrolling through social media, listening to music, on the internet, and I am sure various other tasks.  Whats interesting is how we have become so accustom to always having our cell phones with us.  Its like we never once was able to exist with out them.  If you think back 30 years ago, there was no such thing as a cellular phone.  I believe they had just created the car phones which was the newest invention.  It amazes me how even I cant leave home without my cell phone.  Its literally my life line to my family, friends, bank account, email, photos etc.  

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HOW DID WE DEVELOP CELL PHONE DEPENDENCY?

From what I understand I think it comes down to convenience.  As humans, we will invest in whatever makes our lives easier.  We are easily smitten by the media and its newest inventions to make money.  Every 6 months they come out with a new device that seems to make our lives easier with even faster wi-fi connections.  Along with the newest cell phones, they even have watches that can notify you of missed texts and phone calls.  Is this even necessary?  Don’t get me wrong, I would be an anxious wreck if I didn’t have my cell phone, or to text my husband throughout the day, or have access to my bank account etc.  Its just crazy how we as human got to this place of dependency.  Its definitely a way for the government to keep money flowing in along with student loan debt, taxes, and other ways that humans contribute that are unseen.  If you ever want to see what I am saying, sit and pay attention to the folks around you, how many people are holding or on their cell phone.  Besides talking on the phone, or listening to music, pay attention to folks on the elevator, train, bus, patiently waiting etc. and you will see many people avoid awkward eye contact, conversation, because we have become so prone to being social on our cell phones and less social in person. Just something to observe if you haven’t already.  Thanks for Reading!

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May Favorites!

Hey! Its been a while since I did a favorites post, we are almost through the month of May 2018, and I want to share some of the things that I really enjoyed the past few weeks! Lets go!

Nivea Hydrating Lotion – this lotion is smooth, and melts right into your skin. It definitely keeps you hydrated.  It has a soft fragrance that is not overbearing.  It can be purchased pretty much anywhere and runs you between 8-10.00 depending on where you go.  Its worth a try if you want something new for the summer.

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Fenty Beauty Glow Bomb Lip Gloss – This gloss is the bomb!  Its a neutral color that goes with any outfit, great for the summer.  Leaves your lips plump and pretty.  It runs about 18.00 at Sephora but great to keep in your pocketbook to keep your lips moisturized with a glow!

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Too Faced Chocolate Gold Palette – This is still my favorite palette, it has some gorgeous shades, and the colors blend well.  This is a all seasons palette.  Its pretty pricey but one of their best.  It will run you about 50.00 for this palette. There is slight fall out because the colors are so pigmented so a little gets you a long way.

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No.7 Beautiful Skin Daily Moisturizer- I have just changed my skin care routine and have been using this daily moisturizer with 25 SPF.  It is the bomb.  It does not break me out and leaves my skin hydrated and clear. I pair this with the No.7 Beautiful skim Foam cleanser and age defying serum.  This runs you about 15.00 so its very affordable and can be purchased at Walgreens.

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Carolina Herrera – Good Girl Perfume – this is one of my favorite perfumes, its smells soooo good.  Not to mention the packaging is dope, I love it.  Next time your shopping for a new fragrance, this is worth a try.

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Illuminati, Stay Right Where You Are!

The Media sucks, plain and simple.  They pull us in by broadcasting what is trending at the time and force us to swallow it until its no longer a HOT TOPIC.  Many of these things displayed in the media are planned and sponsored by the big guys behind the scene. The money you have, or can generate will dictate how much love and support the media will give you. If you can bring media attention, and make them money, you can have the spot light.  The media LOVES people who make an ass of themselves and don’t care.  They will actually pay these people to do something unethical JUST to bring attention to their media platform whether its be radio, News, TV, Social media sites etc. For example, Kanye West, he made a complete ass of himself last week and the media took to it, and forced his coonery down our throats.  That’s why they give him the attention cause they support him being an attention whore.  I am not trying to put anyone down in this blog post, but it makes me sick how the media will give the attention to those that really are irrelevant to our lives. Another example is Kim Kardashian.  Hey, I am not hating on her, she pulled the worlds attention in by her fiasco’s and attention whore ways and it paid off for herself and family.  So you think, Kim and Kanye both will do whatever they deem fit to keep media attention them even if it is unethical, selfish, makes no sense.  

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We can look at this as entertainment but when is enough, enough.  When do you sit back and realize making dumb decisions to get media attention is only going to hurt you in the long run.  Another example, the Kardashian sisters all have babies out of wedlock accept Kim (whose marriage I think is crumbling but they are going to hide it and be fake for  ratings.) *sidenote* Typically if these were African american woman, it would be looked down upon, judged, and definitely not gloried in the media.  Its just a double standard.  If it was another rapper who made a fool of themselves like Kanye West did, they would be more than likely black balled.  Oh, but since its Kanye, watch he have an album drop in a few weeks so we LOVE him again, and low key forget what of an ass he made of himself last week.  

One last example, Cardi B, hey she is winning right now.  The media gives her so much attention, and the record labels have put so much money behind her because she is playing the media game, she posts snap chats, Instagram posts almost everyday, she shared 90% of her life online and the media loves her ratchetness. So anyone that is willing to be recruited by the media and play their role to generate a profit whether you sell your soul or not, will be front and center with the medias attention, President TRUMP keeps himself in the media for the WRONG reasons….smh….stay woke lol. Thank you for reading!

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Rejection is God’s Protection…..So You Don’t Say?

I remember hearing this phrase growing up that “Rejection is God’s Protection.”  When you hear this as a kid or young adult, you don’t find much meaning to it.  What I mean is….you really don’t care what the message is, you just WANT what you Want in that moment, and will be willing to do almost anytime to get it.  I am sure majority of us can look back on a situation in life that kept setting us back from what we thought we wanted at the time. can we couldn’t understand why?!  We felt like God is punishing us, and we don’t understand whats going on.  As you get older, this message has more significance because we have more experiences to share. Typically as an adult who understands this message, we can look back on life and see a time when we were rejected.  We thought it was the end of the world until we seen the potential outcome, or what could HAVE been and praise GOD that he prevented the end result from happening.  In return it did not affect us.  This was GOD’s protection.  

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Many times hear on earth we have been accustomed to living MAN’S way instead of the GODLY way.  That is why we have struggles, and obstacles, setbacks, hurt, pain, and situations that we lack understanding. I am not the most religious person at all, but I do agree that points in the bible were written to keep human kind on the straight and narrow path to avoid the world’s destruction.  We are living in MAN’S selfish time so that why we are facing alot of corruption in the 20th century. (in my opinion). I am a living witness where I may have wanted something so bad in the past and GOD rejected it from my life.  After time went on and I got through the sadness of the situation, I was able to look back and be grateful that I made it through because the end result was not favorable and would had brought MAN’S obstacles that we wanted to prevent me from.  It can be the most simplest of situations from dating someone, obtaining a specific job, moving some place, traveling somewhere, avoiding a car accident, ending up hurting yourself etc. The list goes on.  

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So when you face a moment where GOD keeps showing you rejection, and you feel lost.  Always remember he has something better, that’s meant for you, and will save hard ache.  You aren’t suppose to see it now, but your suppose to TRUST THE Journey. Let GO, and Let GOD. When you least expect it, what was meant wont be an obstacle, it will fall in your lap willingly and be even more worth the wait. TIMING is everything in this day and age, but unfortunately its one of the hardest things to be patient with.  Thank you Reading!

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Oh This Thing We Call Marriage….

I can’t be 100% with this comment, but I can guarantee 90 % of women want to get married one day.  How do I know?  Well at some point we want to stop dating, sleeping with different men, and to start a family with ONE person.  We as woman want a purpose, and we get to a point where sewing our wild oats like a man gets really old, say in our late 20’s to mid 30’s. So thus when we find a potential candidate that wants the same things as us in a relationship we consider marriage and creating a family foundation. 

The reality is that although we WANT marriage at some point, it is WORK.  It is constant changing of feelings, opinions and financial factors.  These can alter how strong your relationship is over time.  That is why they say you must marry someone you have a connection/bond with because only this will get you through tough times.  Not sex, not money, not children.  The BOND. I would say the biggest factor that can get you through tough times is communication.  Without this, you basically are two zombies forced to deal with each other until someone reaches their breaking points. This sucks. Many women get to a point where they JUST want it because of their age or to have children, and will take any candidate that looks like he will give it to them especially as women get older.  This isn’t a bright idea because all you will be putting yourself through is misery and a jail sentence.  This you get divorced and now you wasted all your youthful years with the wrong man which will bring resentment.  This is the same for men, marrying the wrong woman will be a disaster in the long run, or short run. Then when kids get involved it really takes a turn for the worst if their is lack in communication, because they will pick up on this and act out.

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My point is, marriage is constant compromise and WORK so make sure to keep a close bond/communication open with your partner.  Below are some ways that can help this:

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Why are we still calling it…..Reality TV??!

At some point it has to stop.  This fake world of trying to get famous quick or become relevant again.  That is what I call fake TV aka Reality TV.  It really has got out of hand!I use to watch reality TV when I was a teenager when it first became popular into my adulthood.  Just recently say about 1 year ago I stopped cold turkey.  When reality TV first became popular with shows like The Real World, Making The Band, Bad Girls Club, Catfish, Basketball Wives, Teenage Moms, The Bachelor etc I watched Reality TV.  I had a laundry list of shows I use to DVR so I didn’t miss while I was at school or work.  It became addictive quick because it allowed you to look into the lives of others, and see all the dysfunction, which pulled you in to the drama once a week.  Its like an addiction.  You can literally be so consumed with making sure you catch up on your reality TV shows that you don’t want to do anything else.  They got us hooked!  

reality-tvAs time went on, you started noticing that regular TV shows became non existent, and replaced by this new thing called Reality TV.  Its as if it took over.  Soon that is all you could find.  Now in 2018, majority of the shows on TV are some form of Reality TV type show.  What sucks is that REALITY TV is NOT REAL!  The definition I googled on Reality TV is: television programs in which real people are continuously filmed, designed to be entertaining rather than informative.  Which means aka – we will make fake story lines or exaggerate scenes for ratings so we can keep people glued in, even if it comes down to acting or creating a fake scene.  How is something fake, your reality?  Many of these Reality TV stars are famous because of social media.  If they did not have a following, and fans that want to see more of the foolery from their show, they would not have a name for themselves.  I will use Cardi B for example.  This woman has been rapping, and trying to put her music out there for years.  She used reality TV as a platform to get her name out there, and to quit stripping.  The money from reality TV helped her, and thus created a huge following for her personality and appearance on Reality TV show Love & Hiphop.  Cardi used social media and her popularity to push her music and create an even bigger name for herself. This goes to show you how powerful Reality TV and Social media, even if its FAKE.  Even if you are given fake roles and story lines for ratings.  America loves drama if its not their OWN.

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My issue with Reality TV is that its making any and everyone famous who don’t have shit to offer positive to society.  Its like these new age rappers which music sucks can push a song on social media, or have an appearance on Reality TV and if they create a buzz, now there trending.  Hey, I am not hating, get it how you live but what happen to good traditional TV shows like: In Living Color, Fresh Prince of Bel-air, Martin, Sister, Sister, Family Matters, Boy Meets World, Beverly Hills 90210 etc.?  Honestly, I don’t even watch cable anymore, I watch Netflix, HULU and shows that actually have good actors, that are entertaining in a GOOD way. I am not knocking anyone who needs their Reality TV fix but honestly I had enough.  I hope they bring good old fashion TV back. Thank you for Reading! 

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